Category: the phoenix

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53 – Mars Attacks: Further Musings (Part 1)

Please see the previous entry to make sense of this one.

The Shape of Mars

There were a few things about the Mars incident that got me thinking.

It wasn’t the fact I was talking to a self-proclaimed god, but more about what I witnessed and what was said.   In fact, I find dealing with such things an exercise in tedium rather than awe inspiring.

When I look at things remotely, they tend to show up as an impression rather than an actual visualization. It would be wonderful if I could see things with clarity, but I’ve learned to work with what I have.

The impressions can be oddly detailed, though. They generally comprise as a quarter image and the other three quarters is information about the image itself. 

I do not attempt filling in the blanks.  When I looked and saw the silhouette of Mars, it was with no preconception.

Curiously enough in 2017, a couple of weeks later, I was talked into seeing the D.C. Wonder Woman movie, which I had zero interest in watching.

The movie itself was better than I expected.  More importantly, the main villain, Ares (alias Mars), looked exactly like the Mars I saw in silhouette when he wore his horned helm.

It was also clear that someone knew how Mars should really look. I often think many creators have more knowledge than they let on.

It’s The Wolluf! (A Lambsy Reference For Those Who Are Too Young To Remember)

You’d think that if I had come across Fenrir before, who is a massive wolf, I’d remember it.  To be frank, I can’t be sure either way.

All I can say about Fenrir is that he is a magnificent being and I wouldn’t want to be on the wrong side of him.

As for what he looked like, they pretty much nailed that in Thor: Ragnarok. (Which came out around six months after this incident.)

When I communicated with him, I somehow knew that I had some agreement in place, and it overrode anything else that was going on. To me, it felt like meeting a friend on the battlefield.

An Avatar of the psychotic goddess, Sekhmet, asked me, back in 2015, if I had made a deal with the wolves. She seemed quite agitated that I had done so.  In fact, she was angry about all the deals I had made over the years. But that was Sekhmet for you: A lunatic goddess.

I checked and found there was something I had done, but never pursued it on this 3D level as I had many other things to focus on.

As most of the things I do either happen on the higher astral levels or before I incarnated here, the details only tend to come up as they are needed, making it seem like I ‘deus ex machina’ my way out of trouble.

Betrayal?

One of the things that really surprised me was when Mars accused me of betraying him and the other gods.  From what I can recall, I never was one to go along with them.   Moreover, there was an assumption that I would not mess with them or interfere in their affairs. This stemmed mostly from my policy that I would not interfere.

This policy came from my time in Atlantis.  I guaranteed that those who came would not be subjected to Galactic Federation law.

What they did not take into account was that this was not going to be forever. There was a sixteen-thousand-year or so period where I would not intervene, but after that time expired, all bets would be off.

While that was never explicitly spelled out, it was something built into the Agreement. At the time, it seemed such a long way off that no one gave it any thought.

Perspective

To try and give it some perspective, it’s very much like saying that today, in 2018, I won’t bother you until the year 18018. That number seems insanely long and maybe even laughable. In the overall scheme of things, it’s just a blink of an eye.

I tend to think in terms of many thousands of years, if not longer.  I don’t just see my current life.  I see all my lives and what has been and is coming.

Most seem to only think of what they can get out of a deal right now. From my personal point of view, if the piper ever has to be paid, then the deal should never be made.

So, I guess, from their point of view, I did betray them.  But having said that, I never promised I would support them either.

To be continued.

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48 – Lilian, The Spirit Baby

Picture by: Stefan Keller 
https://pixabay.com/en/users/kellepics-4893063/

Reality Check

At times, I wonder just how real any of this stuff is. Can so many people seeing the same thing independently still be a coincidence?

I ask myself these questions from time to time, because I never want to succumb to delusions of grandeur.  I need to do the odd reality check, even though you could argue that this is hardly what anyone would call reality.

But it doesn’t matter if I ignore it or not.  Too many others will find me and shatter that illusion.

This is especially true for all the names that have come up in my life. Many of them are major mythological figures.

To my mind, the mention of such names is like name dropping. Yet here we are.

Lilian

As mentioned, Lilith keeps on coming up. I believe I’ve met several of her Avatars, none of them particularly nice.

And in one case involving her, there was something that disturbed me greatly.

In 2010, I met someone who became my partner and friend for seven years until we both felt it was time for us to go our separate ways. Her name was Dori.  She was an amazing person and still is, but life takes us in different directions.

Soon after we met, she was contacted by a spirit who claimed she wanted to be born to both her and me. This spirit called herself Lilian. And while she spoke to my partner, I never heard her. The reason I was given was that I wasn’t ready to hear.

Personally, I call bullshit on that reason. I believe she avoided me because I would have been able to identify her energies.

Incarnated Dakini

Now I had come across this before with my ex-wife back in the year 2000. Only we both felt it was a boy spirit. 

I was suspicious of not being able to sense Lilian, but Dori was quite adamant that this was something that needed to happen for me to move up to my next level.

Dori was an incarnated Dakini, who were the high-level Angels who had agreed to be my Guides in exchange for my Phoenix Energy.  I understood that this baby was meant to be conceived with both Phoenix and Dakini energy. My partner knew and understood this, too.

She told me that Lilian was an ancient spirit who was ready to move to the next level of evolution and wanted to be born to us, so we could help guide and teach her how to use her powers. 

While this made a logical sense, it just didn’t scan for me.

Still, I had agreements to fulfil, and I always fulfil my agreements.

Miscarriages

One thing about Dori was that she was an amazing planner. She had the dates and times down to the minute as to when we should conceive and in 2012 we tried.  The first time ended up in a quick miscarriage.

Then twice more she conceived, and twice, at six weeks, she miscarried. While it was upsetting for us both, I also felt a strange sense of relief; like I had dodged a bullet. From the beginning, I felt a sense of anxiety about the whole thing. After the second time, we stopped trying because the timing was wrong, and I felt that whatever brought us together for this was starting to fade.

USA

At the end of 2015, I moved to the USA with Dori, for a time.  Mari (who was the avatar of Seth), happened to arrive at the same time to visit her family.

In January 2016, Mari’s father died, and her husband came down for the funeral. He was an unassuming man who had way more to him than met the eye. His perceptions, knowledge, and insights often blew me away.

After the funeral, the three of us went out for dinner and as we were talking about things, he would make these deep and insightful comments, almost as though he was channeling.

I mentioned the miscarriages, and that the spirit’s name was Lilian.

Lilith

He said: “You know that was Lilith. She gave the energy and took it back“. Apparently, he meant that my Phoenix energy and Dori’s Dakini energy, was taken by Lilith.

It seemed that Dori had allowed Lilian to add her own energy during conception. She used that to gather up our energy and take it for herself.

“Well, I’ll just take it back,” I said.

He told me, though, that this energy had already been used by her.

Mari had been under a massive psychic attack the previous year.  It was so strong that I didn’t think she would survive it as they tried to rip layers from her soul. Fortunately, she was strong enough to withstand it.

I have no doubt the stolen energy was used to do that.

Mari’s husband wasn’t someone who had been involved with any of the things I did. I believe he did channel that information.

Confirmation

I had long wondered if Lilian was indeed Lilith, but I kept that thought to myself. He confirmed it.

I mentioned this to Dori, who, frustratingly, dismissed this out of hand, saying that this was just a distraction to what I should be doing.

While there was truth in that, it didn’t change the fact that Lilith was involved and, once again, messing with my life.

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46 – About Lilith and Cain

Lilith:  Freeing A Succubus

Here, I go into some speculation. What I write about Lilith and Cain is what I’ve pieced together, so far.

Lilith has been coming up in my life for decades.  I’ve come across several of her Avatars. (I guess that’s the Law of Attraction.)  During one of my earliest Mind Travels, at the age of 12, I found myself in what looked like the inner chamber of a pyramid.

Eventually, I came across a sarcophagus and opened it.  A Spirit fled the moment I did. It had clearly been imprisoned.

(It was only around 2016, that I fully understood that inner pyramid chambers were used to trap Souls and confine them.)

I followed this Spirit and saw it was a woman, who I later worked out to be Lilith.

Lilith was beautiful and she knew it. She used glamour to make herself alluring to the unwary.  At the time, I had no clue what glamour was; only that Lilith was using it.

Every night, I returned to my Mind Travels and observed her.  I noticed that she used her beauty as a lure to control and manipulate others.  I did not hide the fact it was me who had freed her.  It was because of this Lilith took an interest in me.  At first, despite that I believed it was all imaginary, I was flattered.

However, as I saw how Lilith had mastered seduction, I decided it was better not to get involved, and left.

The fact that Lilith was free seemed important to me.   Inasmuch, when I allowed the Astral Assassins to succeed in killing me to shift timelines, one of the first things I did was go back and ensure that Lilith was free again.

This time, I chose not to let her know it was me who had freed her. She then completely dismissed me when I was in her presence.

This was one of those Mind Travels that remained vivid in my mind, and occasionally, my thoughts would return to it.

Supernatural

Decades later, in 2006, my attention was drawn to the name Lilith.  I happened to see an episode of the show “Supernatural,” where the character of Lilith first appeared.  I found that the name fully resonated with me. I felt compelled to look into it, though I did not know where to begin.

I had no doubt I had heard the name before.  I somehow knew that she was the one I freed from her prison, when I was younger.  I felt it was important that I find out who Lilith was and how she fitted in.  I spent years, on and off, doggedly pursuing this path.

Since then, Lilith has come up more times than I can remember, especially with regards to Omen. 

Omen told me that Lilith had appeared to him, and claimed to be his mother. He then raped her.

Why he did that, I cannot say. Ecclasia claimed that it was an event that was hard to ignore if you were in the astral at the time. But that was typical Omen.  He was a demonic, after all.

He also told me that Lilith was the Hindu goddess, Ishtar.

In addition, Scriptures also stated that Lilith was the first wife of Adam, which raised all kinds of interesting questions.

Cain

I always dismissed the story of Adam, Eve and the Garden of Eden.  However, I will admit it got my attention when Omen casually mentioned that Cain was an Incubus.

He was talking about someone else, then said:

Omen:     He’s one of Cain’s kids. So incubus, but doesn’t work for Baal that I know of, but he seems familiar, so yeh probably works for Baal… ehhhh

Gary:     Who is Cain? Not the biblical one?

Omen:     Never met him, apparently he was the “first serpent,” or whatever. What happens when Fae and demons do the dirty, from what I can tell.  He’s Baal’s superior, but no one’s seen him in a while that I can tell… Baal runs the incubus trade, used to support the Legion but now he’s off with the Triquerta.  He supplies all the bodies and feeds them [denoting Triquetra’s agents].  I worked for him for a short stint…..it didn’t work out.  I got fired.

The Great Masquerade

This piece of information fascinated me.  About a year prior, I had several sessions with a role-playing game called:   Vampire: The Great Masquerade.

The Game Master, a man called Jeffrey, gave us a quick bit of history. He said that Cain was the First Vampire and went on to say that no one had seen him in a long time.

The twenty-year-old girl’s body that Omen possessed, had never touched a game, online or off.  Otherwise, I would have believed it was someone spouting off game lore.

More importantly, this also meant the Designers of the game knew what they were doing.  Many real-life facts are found hidden in plain sight.

In any case, the fact that Cain existed meant that Adam and Eve did, too. From this, Omen made a broad implication that, if Cain was indeed the son of Adam and Eve, that would mean that Adam would have been a demon and Eve, a Fae.

Cain was one of those Beings I never expected to come across in this life. But in 2018, someone contacted me who claimed to be him. He seemed genuine, and all his stories checked out. At some point, I hope to give his side of the story about what really happened with Cain and Abel.