Category: Nephthys

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64 – Nephthys On Her Father, Geb

Self-Indulgence

The last entry Nephthys wrote for me, was about me. (Geb) Maybe it’s self-indulgent me putting it here, but I’m going to do so, anyway.

I thank Neph for her contributions and shedding light on a controversial part of mythology.

In The Beginning

In the beginning, before everything went bad, Geb took care of us all. We listened when he spoke, for his words never harmed any of us. He was helpful to all. Not just some, but to all.

All Gods came to Geb at one time, or another. Sometimes we would get upset for not hearing what we wanted, but once we saw he was right, time and time again, it just felt natural to seek Geb.

He didn’t care how big, or small your problem was, he always had a solution. When disagreements came about, Geb was the peace maker. He didn’t take sides, he took both parties, and showed them a solution to end the problem.

Strong Bond

Now don’t think Geb wasn’t powerful, he was one of the most powerful.

Geb had a strong bond with all his children. You could say he wasn’t just our father, he was our friend. He protected us, as we protected him. He would have gatherings with family, and friends all the time.

When our family started to have problems, Geb was there for us all. He never picked sides. His children (Osiris, and Nephthys) thought we could make some choices without consulting Geb.

He warned us and tried to get us to stop what we were doing, but we were already in too deep. Geb never turned his back on us for doing our wrong. Even being deep in shit, Geb never left our side.

Guess you could say, his children actually left him.

A Dark Place

But the one thing about Geb is that he has never held anger towards any of us. With all the wrong we’ve done, my father is still here for us, helping us heal.

When I found Geb in this life, I was in a very dark place. My father never once turned me away, instead he helped me heal. I wanted to leave this hell, but my father stood beside me, and pushed me forward. He would not let me give up.

As I go to write what I know, I fill with anger, and I want to let everyone know he didn’t do anything wrong. You all blame him for your actions. We all chose fame, and power over doing what was right. We are not stuck here: we are paying our dues/healing from our mistakes.

Going Home

The longer it takes for you to stop blaming him, the sooner you can go home. He is not stopping you from leaving this place, you are stopping yourself. You know deep down in your soul you did wrong. Not Geb.

Before things went bad in Egypt, everyone looked to Geb for guidance. He never done any of us wrong. You didn’t have to be his family for Geb to help you with what was needed. We all listened to what he had to say, and never thought he could possibly be wrong. The powers he holds were/is to protect all of us, not help wage war on each other.

When things started changing, Geb was the one who tried to make peace. He didn’t preach to the crowds, but each individual that he knew was having problems, he would go and talk with.

Geb’s family was very important to him. And with Isis, Nut, Hathor, and Lilith all trying to take his power, (Phoenix power) Geb stayed back in the shadows listening and watching.

Warnings

Giving warnings to us all. Geb warned Osiris, but Osiris chose not to listen to his father. I chose not to listen to my father.

Even with Seth giving me the same warning, I didn’t listen. Seth… he listened to what Geb had to say, but the anger that raged inside, made Seth choose to leave.

As Egypt started to fall, Geb was still there for us all.

Sure, he had his own enemies trying to destroy him so they could rule in his place. By that I mean, his voice was calming, his words were wisdom. Geb’s doing now, as he did then, helping us all remember who we are, helping us heal, so we can all go home.

Let Go

If we know who we are, and have memories of the past, why can’t you remember how kind Geb was? Why can you not let go of the hate you created for him because of your actions of the past?

Let go of the past if you want to go home. Let Geb show you how to get home. He’s been here with us all this time, trying to help us all find our way home.

So you hold anger because Geb didn’t stop the fall of Egypt? We all knew what we were doing would catch up to us at some point. We all knew Geb could have stopped it all, but what would we have learned from that?

Nothing, except for we can do what we want, ’cause we know someone would come behind us, and fix it. That would have just made things worse for this world.

Could you imagine all Gods fighting for power in this day and age? I can tell you now, the world would not be as it is today. You would not have the freedom you do now.

Forgiveness

I’ve done some very bad things in my past that I’m not proud of, but one thing I am proud of is Geb. He forgave me for all the wrong I’ve done. He’s the one who helped me heal in this life.

Geb wants to go home too, but he refuses to leave any of us who truly want to heal and go home, behind. You may not like what he has to say, but believe me, he knows what he’s talking about.

I choose to stay here and heal. I want to go home more than anything, but I will not go until Geb goes, too.

Sorry for sounding so harsh, I just get full of rage when I see others thinking my father is here to harm us. When others blame him for their own actions. I was a dark evil bitch for many life times, I was forgiven, and started to heal. During that process, I was told I get to go home. So please tell me how Geb is at fault for our actions.

Healing

I’ve seen many come to my father for healing, and I’ve seen others attack him for helping all of us and blaming him for their mistakes.

Geb could go home at any time he wanted, but he refuses to leave any of his family behind. We all came here together; we all leave here together.

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63 – Nephthys -: Osiris’ Death. The Aftermath.

Secrets

I gave my word that I would never speak of what ISIS did to Osiris. Osiris made me give him my word. The only reason why I speak of it now is because of the damage it did to me, and to him.

I’m sure Seth’s anger had something to do with Osiris, and ISIS. But not the reasons we think. This may surprise most of you, but it had nothing to do with me.

Like I said before, my actions just added fuel to the fire. Not because Seth and I were in love, but because I always respected him, and took his advice.

Warnings

Seth warned me to stay away, but this one time, I didn’t listen. I took it upon myself to take ISIS at her word that she would leave me alone. I thought I could fix this on my own. Not knowing at the time, Osiris was in the situation he was in.

Because Osiris is my brother, I can feel when he’s upset with me. (Just like now, he feels I went back on my word.) Maybe I did, but I did it to help him. He’s my brother.

Guess you can say he’s the male side of my soul. I want to tell his story, to help him, and to heal what I’ve done to him.

Cut To Pieces

It is true, Seth did cut Osiris into pieces. It’s also true that I went with ISIS to gather all his parts. It is also true that a part of him wasn’t found. (The Phallus.) And it’s also true that his spine wasn’t found.

As ISIS and I searched for Osiris’s missing pieces, I found his spine. I was so pissed off at him for not speaking up on my behalf, I hid it. He didn’t use it anyways, why did he need it now? 

As ISIS, and I, put Osiris back together, she noticed the spine was missing. She also knew it wouldn’t work if all the pieces were not put back.

The Deal

So… ISIS made a deal with Horus. He was to step in, and become Osiris. She told him this would only be temporary. As Horus went around as Osiris, ISIS, and I kept searching for those missing pieces. At this point, I hated ISIS, and Osiris, and I wasn’t giving up what I had hidden.

ISIS started to notice that the body of Osiris was starting to look different. It wasn’t holding its shape. Its spine was missing. ISIS panicked.

She went back on her word to Horus. He could feel the body weighing him down, making him weak. ISIS told Horus she needed him, and could fix this. ISIS called a private meeting with a few of her honorable friends to help.

Trapped

As ISIS, was off to the side talking about what was needing to be done, Horus told me he feared he was trapped. He made me promise not to let him destroy anything while in the control of ISIS.

Osiris #2 (aka Horus the Younger), holds something within him that can be activated to destroy both bodies.

There would be no coming back from this. Horus the Younger must of heard something he shouldn’t, for making a deal like that was unheard of. But I agreed to it.

Returning The Spine

In this life I have done some major healing. My father had told me he knew Osiris didn’t have a spine. Even then, I didn’t give up where it was at. Once I realized keeping things that didn’t belong to me, and how important it was for my father to help all his children, I retrieved the spine.

I had Osiris meet me in the valley of some mountains, that is when I gave him what belonged to him. Now it’s not my fault he doesn’t use it. Well maybe it is. Having it kept from him all these years, maybe he forgot how to use it.

This is not told to hurt any of my family members. I tell my story to help my family heal. No matter what we did or said in the past should be brought past this life. They are me, as I am them.

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62 – Nephthys Speaks About Seth

Nephthys Speaks About Seth

To me, Seth has always been a subject of interest. I know he was around me from the very start of this life. Both as antagonist and protector.

There was a time in the 80s when just thinking of the name gave me a very uncomfortable feeling, though I did not know why.  But that story is recounted in “I am The Phoenix”.

What follows are Nephthys’ thoughts on Seth.

Childhood

Growing up, my grandparents were my life. Never in my life did I ever love so much, and so hard. I spent weekends with them. In return, I had to go to Church on Sundays. Fine by me. I remember hearing about Seth, and what he was about. The bible called him the devil. He was a bad person, and would harm us, but as long as we served their God, he couldn’t hurt us.

Now I wasn’t really into what the Church had to say, but the stories of Seth made me feel uneasy. And it seemed like every Sunday I went to Church, they were always preaching about how bad the devil was, and how God is the only one to save you from him.

The Devil

As a teenager, I feared the devil. No, I didn’t pray, but I felt like I had been found. Like I was/ had been in hiding. I felt like the Church singled me out. Bad things would happen to me. I knew it was the “Devil” doing it.

I remember at one time, saying “wow, I must be special for the Devil to attack me so much”. As my life seemed to get darker, the attacks got stronger.

I was married to an Apep Avatar, who was taking my power away from me, and I was getting attacked by something I couldn’t see.

Computer Game

One day my husband brought me home this computer game that had to do with Gods, and Goddesses of Egypt. I played the game, and fell in love with ISIS, and Osiris.

I wished I was ISIS. I would feel this pull from inside me telling me to love this game, and to play it as much as I could.  I remember hating Nephthys, and Seth. At the time, I didn’t know that this Egyptian computer game was the key that activated the love spell/curse ISIS put on me.

At one point, my husband was hurting physically. His lower back was giving him problems. After months of hearing him cry like a baby, I was done. I wanted his pain to go away. I tried everything. The one thing that came to my mind was to offer my soul to the devil. The devil who had been attacking me.

The Bargain

The one I feared the most: Seth. That night as my husband, and I were walking to bed, I stated in my head, Seth, my soul is yours to keep, if you make my husband’s pain go away. The next day, I woke up to my husband all happy being pain free. At that moment, my heart sank. The devil had taken me up on my offer. At that point I said I was going to live life.

I was going to see as much beauty this world had to offer before leaving it, because my soul was going to burn in hell. Needless to say, that didn’t happen.

As the days went by, my life became darker, and darker. I would try to find ways out. The attacks on me were stronger, and stronger. At one point I broke. I told the devil enough was enough. He had my soul already, so leave me alone, stop attacking me.

Soul Searching

As life became so dark, I became powerless. I didn’t care if my soul was going to hell to burn, I wanted out of this place.

For me earth is a hell all on its own. The attempts to leave never worked. Forces I couldn’t see fought against me, leaving me here on earth. I even got to the point of hating the Devil.

As I grew older, things started happening. I started doing some soul searching. That’s when I found my soul father. And through him, I met my brother. At first, I didn’t have a good feeling about meeting him. I felt like he didn’t care much for me. But I really didn’t feel all that great about him. I didn’t know why, but something felt off.

Confusion

When I found out the name of my brother, I felt confused. Why did he attack me all those times, all those years? I was already having a bad time at life, why make it harder. Why attack me?

Those questions were answered. He attacked me, because of who I am, and that was suppose to take place, to help me wake up. My brother hated me, and he had very good reasons to.

When things started going bad in Egypt, he felt like I turned on him. Others had already turned on him, making him look like the bad guy, when really, they were the bad guys. Power hungry gods, and goddesses.

I focused on this feeling of not liking Seth very much, and wanted to know why, so I asked to feel my emotions that were attached to him. I didn’t hate him for all the bad things he done to me to help me wake up. I was angry at him for leaving me behind.  I blamed him for not getting me away from ISIS. I was upset because I told him the truth about the ISIS, and Osiris thing.

Part of the Problem

Out of all, Seth should have known I was telling the truth, but he walked away, telling me I got myself into this mess, I can get myself out. What I done probably added fuel to the fire, but Seth’s anger didn’t come from what I did, it was something else. Something I really didn’t know about, because of what ISIS had me going through.

I felt so ashamed for spending so much energy on hating him for something he didn’t do. He might have left me behind, but I had created a mess for myself. A mess I didn’t want no part of, but became a part of, nonetheless.

Once you became a part of the problem, you couldn’t get out. ISIS wouldn’t let you.

Do I still fear Seth? No, I do not. Do I forgive him for leaving me behind? Not really. As for now I see he had nothing to do with it.  My choices made me stay behind. I regret holding anger towards him, for blaming him. The real question is… Does Seth hold anything against me for blaming him for my mistakes?

My Thoughts on Deals

Making any kind of deal with Lucifer (The Devil) or Seth (Satan) is not really a wise idea, no matter what your reasons. It’s short term gains for long term pains, assuming you are able to survive the consequences.

Many do it, and pay the price.

In this case, Nephthys got lucky. The deal she made was dissolved upon my request. I just happened to be in a position where I was able to do that.