Category: Dakini

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48 – Lilian, The Spirit Baby

Picture by: Stefan Keller 
https://pixabay.com/en/users/kellepics-4893063/

Reality Check

At times, I wonder just how real any of this stuff is. Can so many people seeing the same thing independently still be a coincidence?

I ask myself these questions from time to time, because I never want to succumb to delusions of grandeur.  I need to do the odd reality check, even though you could argue that this is hardly what anyone would call reality.

But it doesn’t matter if I ignore it or not.  Too many others will find me and shatter that illusion.

This is especially true for all the names that have come up in my life. Many of them are major mythological figures.

To my mind, the mention of such names is like name dropping. Yet here we are.

Lilian

As mentioned, Lilith keeps on coming up. I believe I’ve met several of her Avatars, none of them particularly nice.

And in one case involving her, there was something that disturbed me greatly.

In 2010, I met someone who became my partner and friend for seven years until we both felt it was time for us to go our separate ways. Her name was Dori.  She was an amazing person and still is, but life takes us in different directions.

Soon after we met, she was contacted by a spirit who claimed she wanted to be born to both her and me. This spirit called herself Lilian. And while she spoke to my partner, I never heard her. The reason I was given was that I wasn’t ready to hear.

Personally, I call bullshit on that reason. I believe she avoided me because I would have been able to identify her energies.

Incarnated Dakini

Now I had come across this before with my ex-wife back in the year 2000. Only we both felt it was a boy spirit. 

I was suspicious of not being able to sense Lilian, but Dori was quite adamant that this was something that needed to happen for me to move up to my next level.

Dori was an incarnated Dakini, who were the high-level Angels who had agreed to be my Guides in exchange for my Phoenix Energy.  I understood that this baby was meant to be conceived with both Phoenix and Dakini energy. My partner knew and understood this, too.

She told me that Lilian was an ancient spirit who was ready to move to the next level of evolution and wanted to be born to us, so we could help guide and teach her how to use her powers. 

While this made a logical sense, it just didn’t scan for me.

Still, I had agreements to fulfil, and I always fulfil my agreements.

Miscarriages

One thing about Dori was that she was an amazing planner. She had the dates and times down to the minute as to when we should conceive and in 2012 we tried.  The first time ended up in a quick miscarriage.

Then twice more she conceived, and twice, at six weeks, she miscarried. While it was upsetting for us both, I also felt a strange sense of relief; like I had dodged a bullet. From the beginning, I felt a sense of anxiety about the whole thing. After the second time, we stopped trying because the timing was wrong, and I felt that whatever brought us together for this was starting to fade.

USA

At the end of 2015, I moved to the USA with Dori, for a time.  Mari (who was the avatar of Seth), happened to arrive at the same time to visit her family.

In January 2016, Mari’s father died, and her husband came down for the funeral. He was an unassuming man who had way more to him than met the eye. His perceptions, knowledge, and insights often blew me away.

After the funeral, the three of us went out for dinner and as we were talking about things, he would make these deep and insightful comments, almost as though he was channeling.

I mentioned the miscarriages, and that the spirit’s name was Lilian.

Lilith

He said: “You know that was Lilith. She gave the energy and took it back“. Apparently, he meant that my Phoenix energy and Dori’s Dakini energy, was taken by Lilith.

It seemed that Dori had allowed Lilian to add her own energy during conception. She used that to gather up our energy and take it for herself.

“Well, I’ll just take it back,” I said.

He told me, though, that this energy had already been used by her.

Mari had been under a massive psychic attack the previous year.  It was so strong that I didn’t think she would survive it as they tried to rip layers from her soul. Fortunately, she was strong enough to withstand it.

I have no doubt the stolen energy was used to do that.

Mari’s husband wasn’t someone who had been involved with any of the things I did. I believe he did channel that information.

Confirmation

I had long wondered if Lilian was indeed Lilith, but I kept that thought to myself. He confirmed it.

I mentioned this to Dori, who, frustratingly, dismissed this out of hand, saying that this was just a distraction to what I should be doing.

While there was truth in that, it didn’t change the fact that Lilith was involved and, once again, messing with my life.

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40 – Guides, Synchronicity, And Soul Calls

Guides, Synchronicity, And Soul Calls

For those who have been following my life story; you might say it reads like a contrived script for a low budget Hollywood movie or a poorly written fantasy novel.

Everything conveniently happens because plot demands it. Be it encountering certain people, some crucial piece of information I need, or some deux-ex-machina type solution that gets myself or friends out of deep trouble.

If this had been a work of fiction I was reading, I would have thrown the book aside in annoyance by now and gone on a rant about how unrealistic everything is.

However, it’s not fiction.  It’s my life.  It’s really happening; and I doubt I have the skills to make up this kind of story.

Fortunately, there is a valid explanation for how it all works.

Synchronicity

Carl Jung coined a term called Synchronicity.  It basically means that there is no such thing as coincidence. Everything that happens has been agreed upon, and events are used to move you forward on your chosen path.  While synchronicities may appear random and by chance, they most certainly are not.

While it’s nice to have a term that describes such things; Carl Jung only put a name to something that has always existed. Most Masters and Beings already know about this phenomenon.

If I tried to personally arrange and coordinate everything for my life to work out the way it has, I’d have more chance at winning the lottery.

Fortunately, there is more than just me. I have guides and helpers who work on many levels. I also have lines of Fate, that help ensure certain outcomes.

The Dakini

I have extraordinary Guides known as the Dakini who I consider to be some of the best guides available. Before I incarnated into this current body, I approached them and asked them for help.

I promised the Dakini certain things in exchange for their assistance.  They agreed.  They have been guiding and guarding my life every step of the way. They are not my only Guides, but they have done an amazing job.

I arranged for my Guides to help me awaken when the time was right. To help remind me who I really am. I told them to never let up, not for a moment.  I also acknowledged what a tedious job it would be for them, repeating the same message over and over to me in my mind.

Thanks to their exceptional skill and effort, my Guides ensure that everything that needs to happen, happens. They make sure that I’m in the right place, at the right time, hearing the information I need, or meeting up with someone who gives me another piece of the puzzle.

What seems like a chance encounter ends up revealing critical information.

When it’s important, my Guides (or me) will put out a Soul Call for those who need to find me.

Seth

Two Soul Calls of note (though by no means the only ones), are how my Soul Children located me. Each one felt strongly compelled to find and contact me.

For anyone who has read “I am The Phoenix”, they will know that one Soul Child of note is Seth.  Seth’s current incarnation is in a female body named Mari. Mari literally felt the Soul Call the day it was sent out for other Phoenii to find me. The Soul Call was so strong that she spent the better part of a week trying to track it down, and eventually we met in a chat room that I frequented.

The chat room, Celestine Vision, was based on the philosophy of Synchronicity.  In the year 2000, the Dakini told me they had hired the website administrator to create this chat interface. 

As a result, I gained many vital connections and discovered important information. It all found its way to the chat.

There was an instant connection with Mari. Over the years, we have helped each other to remember and validate our memories, including what happened in our past lives.

When we met neither of us was sure who we really were. All we knew was that we were both Phoenii.  It took me around three years to work out who Mari was, and I often would put theories to my Guides.

At one point, I was so lost, my Guides responded to me:    Now, you’re guessing!

Then one day, late in 2009, I looked at a photo of Mari.  Suddenly, I just knew who she was.  Why I felt it and how; I honestly cannot tell you. I just knew. Just like a parent knows their own child.

When I told Sophie, she asked Nicole who quickly validated it. She had known Seth in many of her incarnations and knew exactly who she was.

And it’s been chaos ever since…

NUT Goddess Of The Sky

The other Soul Call was my Twin Soul, NUT (pronounced “noot”).

In 2012, a year after I had accepted that I was Geb, I idly thought to myself that I must have a sister and that NUT may be somewhere out there. 

I sent a quick mental call out to her and promptly forgot about it.

It couldn’t have been more than 36 hours later; I received an e-mail from someone who claimed to feel strongly compelled to contact me. She said she needed help and that it felt like her heart was breaking.

Moon

Her name was Moon, she lived in Canada and when I spoke to her, I felt a very strong sense that I knew her.  She believed she was the goddess ISIS. (As NUT was the mother of ISIS, and they carry a very similar energy, it made sense.)

I soon realized that she wasn’t ISIS. That she was NUT, herself, and a fully manifested Avatar at that.

Moon was her real name.  According to mythology, NUT was considered to be the Mother of the Moon and Sun; including the title Goddess of the Sky.

To add confirmation, her Facebook email also was, “Goddess of the Sky.”

Past Issues

You would think this would have been a happy reunion.  On the contrary, we had parted on bad terms.  Moon was still extremely angry with me because I had chosen Seth over what she had wanted.

Moon wrote to me:    I shall let you choose your path. And I will never try to influence you. I think this affected me a lot more than it did to[sic] you.

     You forgot one thing, that I was your wife and your decisions affected me. You decided to do things without thinking about me.  I wish you would think how I would feel.  But I don’t know why that meant we were not together.  I still can’t accept it.

Moon was also adamantly pushing me to go to Canada and be with her.  I knew this would be a very bad idea.

I won’t go into the details, but Moon became angry with me.  Especially when I told her I could not be with her because I was in a relationship.  After a few weeks, she abruptly blocked me and stopped talking.

Reconciliation

The whole episode left me feeling bemused. Not only was it another confirmation that I was Geb, but I felt I had opened up a hornet’s nest of unresolved issues that I had been oblivious to.  (I soon discovered that she wasn’t the only one I had jilted, though that would be another story.)

It was three and a half years later when Moon finally made contact with me again. She told me she was living in New York, and she didn’t remember everything that had happened between us; but she knew it was time to let go of the past and move forward.

Moon felt genuine, and I felt a sense of relief that we could at least reconcile.

Canada

In another amazing Synchronicity, I ended up living in Toronto, Canada for 6 months in 2016 to early 2017.  Moon also ended up there at the same time and we lived 30 minutes away from each other.

We were able to meet up several times, and having met Moon in person, I have no doubt she is who I thought:  NUT.

There was no pull to be with her, though. But there was a flow. In the 3D, however, we are just too different to be together.

We have our own ideas on how things should be done. She is technically my opposite, after all.

Soul Binds

So many individuals have found me over the years when I’ve sent out a Soul Call. To date many associates, and my Soul Children, have found me.  Such people help validate who I am, the memories we share, and many of the things that have gone on.

Those who I first thought were allies, turned out to be anything but.

Thus, along with people such as those who remember their past lives, it helps to build a much bigger picture.

I have been blessed with so many wonderful people who have come into my life. I started off from a place where I felt I was totally alone and have found that, over the years, I am far from that.

Death Do Us Part

We become Soul Bound by acts of love, hate, anger, revenge, curses and so on.

This is one good reason to think carefully before attacking someone in your current life or making any deal or agreement with a particular person. Death is not the end of our association, by any means.

With that being said, I am grateful that someone saw fit and was wise enough to include the statement: “Till death do us part,” in marriage vows.  At least those vows won’t carry over into other lives.